The sad life of a social media influencer

How it feels to be disposable

Feb 23, 2025

Stacey’s life was, by all accounts, perfect.

Her mornings started slowly with matcha lattes and long walks in the sun. In the afternoon, she went to the gym for no less than 2 hours at a time. At the end of the day, she ate filet mignon with her fiancé at the beachfront property she purchased when she was 25.

And she shared every moment of it with her 1.2 million followers online.

Stacey was one of the original fitness influencers.

She rose to fame on Instagram during a time where people just sort of stumbled into that kind of thing. Best known for her fierce discipline and 12% body fat, she struck the perfect balance between aspirational and relatable, making her an instant hit within the fitgirl community.

She dry-scooped pre-workout and spent her weekends at Gymshark events in LA. And we watched, like a television show with no plot, every detail of her life online, consuming story after story, post after post, update after update.

Until one day, it stopped.

No posts, no stories.

Nothing.

I’m always curious when influencers stop posting at the height of their success.

Unlike traditional celebrity-ism which has some staying power, the influencer model demands constant attention. Two weeks without posting might as well be ten years.

So what drives someone to throw it all away?

Stacey’s silence went on for months. Comments “hoping she was okay” flooded her old posts. Several months in, she posted an underexposed photo of a butterfly along with a cryptic caption about “overcoming challenges” that sent followers into a tizzy.

The account stagnated. The followers diminished.

We all forgot.

A year or so later, I was scrolling through YouTube when I saw a recommended video posted 3 hours earlier by an account I didn’t recognize.

I squinted at the thumbnail. Could it be?

It was. Or at least, it kind of was. The fitness influencer I never knew, now 80 pounds heavier, sitting on the floor of her house, crying into the camera.

Red swollen puffy eyes. Baggy sweatshirt. Unkempt.

For the next 20 minutes I watched, once again, as she told the story of her previous year and the debilitating illness that left her bed bound, though she couldn’t figure out if it was in her body or her mind.

She talked about the feelings of overwhelm that consumed her, eventually convincing her to sell her house and break up with her fiancé.

“I couldn’t be on social media. It made everything worse.”

It was a really hard time, but now that she was feeling better, she was ready to give herself fully to her followers once more. She was grateful to the platform and her sponsors. Most importantly, she was grateful to her followers for sticking by her through these difficult times.

But did they?

Stacey dropped off the internet, like so many creators do, citing mental health challenges and burn out.

And when she returned to the platform, like so many creators do, she found there was nothing to return to.

Her booty bands had been discontinued. Her strength app was shut down. Her coveted brand deals ditched her when they stopped seeing a return.

Even Instagram itself decided she was no longer relevant, hiding her posts and limiting her reach.

And if all of that wasn’t enough, the following she had built on hard work and discipline did not resonate with this new, softer version of Stacey. When the glute workouts turned into morning meditations, the few who had stuck around left too.

We often forget that the influencer model is built on consumption.

Watch the content. Buy the thing.

To leave a platform for any period of time is a direct threat to their revenue model. Which means as soon as you leave, you will be demoted, and a new willing participant will fill your place.

If and when you do return, grasping at what you once had, you are likely to find it is already gone.

57% of Gen Z wants to be an influencer, but I think it’s the hardest job in the world.

Open yourself up to an incomprehensible amount of hate in exchange for a taste of adoration. Produce content at a dizzying rate, 24/7/365, with anxiety pulsing through your veins.

Give so much of yourself and your life away, only to discover that the minute you stop producing for the platform, the platform stops producing for you.

Such is the sad life of the social media influencer.

Since this is technically a “wellness” newsletter, I’m adding this little section where I’ll talk about some personal “wellness” things (I’m still trying to come up with a fun name for it).

I’m currently training for the Grand Canyon Rim to Rim hike in May. It’s 38 km and includes a 4,500 ft climb (and 6,000 ft descent). I ran a marathon last May then pretty much didn’t do any serious cardio for 8 months (outside of regular walking and hiking), so it’s cool getting back into training for something. My favorite workout right now is walking on the treadmill at a varying 12-15% incline at 3.2 mph for 60 min. Highly recommend.

Also, I finally splurged and ordered AG1 for myself. Hope it changes my life!!

xoxo Kelly